Perhaps it's the season rubbing off on me, but I am finding myself to be incredibly impatient lately! I am wanting change. And I want it now. Maybe it's because I've been so used to consistent change. In college, I took different classes every semester, moved to a different apartment about every 6 months; there were things to look forward to that were planned out. Whereas now, I don't know what's going to happen! But I want it to happen quick, because I hate not knowing.
I still haven't heard back from about four of the PA schools that I've applied to. So far, all the ones that have responded have been rejections. That's always fun. At first, it hurt. But then after a while it started to dull and then it became an expectation. Each letter would come through the mail and I'd think, OK, onto the next rejection. In fact, a part of me is expecting not to get into any of the remaining schools. I guess that could be a bad thing in some people's eyes, but I think it's a mindset that is preparing me for something different in case this whole PA school thing doesn't work out. Rather than being devastated, I will have a plan to move forward. And in fact we do have a back-up plan! There are plenty of other exciting things we can do with our lives. And we are still just starting our lives together!
The world is our oyster! - a quote I hear quite often from my husband.
Here is a new change. Jonathan has created his own business!
Bear River Media is a social media managing company where, you guessed it, Jonathan manages your social media! That means facebook, twitter, pinterest, instagram, blogs, you name it. As well as coming up with other advertising efforts and campaigns. It's pretty smart, considering that's where all business is going anyways (if they haven't already gone there). Mostly everyone's audience is on social media. But no one likes to keep up with the million of social websites out there. There are way too many and it drains your time by the hour. That is why hiring someone else to do the work for you is so wise! Not to put in a shameless plug in for my husband's business, but I just did.
It is super exciting! I don't think this is going to be our sole future, but it is something that Jonathan is trying out and hopefully it brings in some side money, as well as such great experience! I am so proud of him, doing something so hard and brave.
I want to do things like this.... things that help us move onto the next chapter in our lives. I feel like we are still in this limbo-phase. My life is seriously this one tragic cycle. I wake up, snooze for 10 minutes, leave for work in a rush 5 minutes later, WORK, come home, eat, shower, turn on the TV, fall asleep on the couch and then go to bed. I totally get it now when older people used to tell me that work becomes your life! It truly does. I feel like these people sometimes.
Expressionless. No hope, no excitement, nothing to do with life but go to work. And I guess if you love your work then you don't feel like this! If you are passionate and feel like you are making a difference, then that is living life. Unfortunately for me, I fall far from that. I am a college graduate earning 10 bucks an hour and getting rejected from nearly every graduate school I've applied to. And if I'm not going to get into PA school, then what am I doing? I'm pretty over this whole work thing. I am wanting to move on! NOW!
However, that's not how life works sometimes. Sometimes change requires patience.
I've had to remind myself recently that the point of this life is not to get to the end. It's to enjoy the journey. How many times have I heard that?! Like one too many. But it's true! And enjoying the journey means that sometimes we will have to patiently endure. Wait for what we want with a huge smile on our face and trying to be grateful for everything around us. And perhaps during that waiting, what we thought we wanted wasn't really what we needed in our lives. Patiently enduring can often take us on a different path. That may be happening to me right now. Who knows?
We will have to patiently wait and see........
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